Studied today. Was extra motivated because of The Instituition. Thus was not distracted by anything at all for several hours. :) Was multi-tasking quite well in fact. Listening to music, doing work and thinking.
What would it be like if I were to enter The Instituition. To go to its football matches, and watch lacrosse with my fellow dorm mates. What a great honour it would be. How much pride I would feel. Will my heart do a dance?
For once, I actually believed there was a chance. That I, had the chance. It seems impossible. But how impossible can impossible be?
Now a little part of it, will become a little part of me. Will it grow? Will it consume my being?
Why am I me, instead of someone else?
If I could have this, and not have that. If I was there, instead of over here. How would it be?
I am afraid to pursue what is deemed illusory. All that is gained in the expense of my nerves decade after decade can be confiscated in one fell night. Do I cower infront of misfortune and yearn after happiness? It is, after all, all the same. The bitter doesn't last forever, yet the sweetness never overflows.
Nevertheless, I will go without a coat when it's cold, to find out what cold is.
