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Sunday, February 6, 2011

I'm scared of so many things. I have this really disconcerting feeling right now. It's like I'm stuck between a happy feeling and a sad feeling. To me happiness is not feeling worry, since I spend almost every waking moment worrying about something...

I don't know how to describe it. It's like this sense of foreboding, like I know there will be so many troubles ahead of me, and I worry about how I am going to deal with them. I worry about missed opportunities. I haven't missed it yet, but it's like somehow I feel that when the time comes, I won't be able to make full use of that opportunity and leave it feeling a hell load of regret.

It's difficult to explain. It's just a bad feeling. I feel really bad about this. Like my life is wasted on something, that I should have done something earlier. Should have thought about stuff earlier, been mature earlier. Not done so many foolish things. Not wasting so much time.

I hope tomorrow will be a new day.




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