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Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Im still in the school library. I ought to be going home nw because im being really unproductive here.

Just wanted to blog abt stuff.
Like I don't really know whats the problem here. Firstly I didn't expect u to be so riled up over what I think is a trivial matter. Did u nt know I was joking? if u didnt then fine, Im wrong here okay. Im taking the first step to apologise.

I just want u to know I have never had any ill intentions. If u didnt think I was joking, I accept that. I might nt have known my limits as u called it but what I dont understand was how u acty thought I derived joy out of ur misery.Seriously? I have never ever wished bad upon anyone EVER. and if u thought that I am just so hurt and disappointed really.

Did u really think that I meant to hurt ppl intentionally? To brand ppl as emotionless cuz I wanted to hurt? I am not that sadistic.

Why would I want to hurt ppl just so I feel good? Honestly I thought it was a joke. I swear. And if u cant accept this kind of jokes just sry cuz what is done is done. Now I dont know what limit that is because Ive known u for years and sometimes u laugh and this time u didnt so I dont know. Best nt to make any jokes anymore cuz I might overstep the line? Everything is so risky. Nxt time if I offend u just tell me, because I will change and I will learn.

Do u know how many times I have just accepted it, I have accepted u insulting me or treating me badly n not given a damn and nt saying anything abt it? maybe we both have done this. Bt we shldnt keep it a secret. Shldnt hold it. I mean, I shld hold it because I know u get angry easily.

Let me clarify something first okay. Just tell me what u r displeased about. I promise I will never get angry. Ok thats a lie, I will. But I will try to understand why. Gimme ur reasons n I will try to change for the better. I don't want to be stuck in this rut putting on some stupid fake face. If you're angry just say everything. Don't hold back. Believe me, I won't blame u. I will just ask why. And try to understand why u feel that way. If i dont, refer me back to this post so I remember.

I may nt be the best person, the greatest friend or whatever but I am always trying to learn. I may be angry at the moment and I confess, I am so friggin bloody annoyed right now, but I know in the end I want the best for the both of us. And I will never ever ever want to hurt people intentionally, that I am sure of. I am not some sadistic bitch that delights in other ppls misery and laugh. Even the jokes i make of ppl everyday, i have never for one second, been totally happy abt making fun of other ppl. Lest you.

Tell me whats wrong with me. Just tell me.




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